Tag Archives: Sexual Healing

Your Orgasm Is Your Responsibility! Say What?

Touch yourself

How many women and men feel it’s alright to self pleasure (masturbate) while in a relationship? Or do you feel your sexual pleasure is the full responsibility of your lover? Did you know you are 90% responsible for your orgasm? Yes, and the other 10% is based on attraction, visual aesthetics, environment and other stimulating factors.

I’ve come to terms with my pleasure being my responsibility with or without my lover.  It’s my orgasm and I own it!  Now, I do enjoy our intimacy, and the warmth of his body, and every stimulating touch and deep stroke. Yes, I do, and because I do I relieve him of always having to be available to my pleasure, and allow him time to restore himself for those times I need and crave him the most, which is often enough. Plus, self pleasure is just oh so healthy, and a form of self love that I can’t deny myself the opportunity, nor the pleasure to touch myself, and to enjoy and experience all of me in full orgasmic abundance.  I would hate to put all of the responsibility of my orgasm on my lover. I want no pressure on his part when it comes to pleasing me! It can be quite overwhelming, and extremely pressing on the relationship as a whole, depending on your lover for your total orgasmic sensations. I want him to desire me, because his need for me has arisen from the deep recesses of his soul, and his scrotum, not because he feels obligated to do me, because it’s his duty, or my right. Hell, to the naw! 

Finding pleasure and joy with myself is a great way to celebrate me, and feed myself, and build my love arsenal in order to have some more good lovin’ to share. Sexually stimulating and pleasuring myself opens me up to new feelings of desire, and awakens my sexual energy, my joy, my fantasy and my creativity. I utilize my self pleasure as a sex magic ritual. Breathing, and meditating. Visualizing a higher love. Releasing moans of oooh’s, om’s and ahhh’s while speaking to the lover in me. Calling forth the love I deserve and desire in building our relationship forward. It’s a great way to reaffirm my love for myself, and my role as a desirable woman. It’s confirmation that I’m alive and a sensual, loving and sexual being, FULL of juicy goodness in the center of my knowing, in the center of my sweet spot. Don’t deny your pleasures. Self pleasure creates access to a whole new world available to you. It’s opens portals to your abundance, and increases your love bank giving you more than enough to share as your pleasure cup runneth over. You and your lover can let go of your inhibitions, and experience multiple orgasmic sensations that reach a higher level of awareness with no shame, no guilt, just intimacy, and ecstasy. Raise some pressure up off your relationship. Touch yourself, and think about how beautiful you are in the moment. There’s love, healing  and expansion there. Men know this! It’s an unwritten rule. They believe in stroking themselves when we aren’t around ladies, and we should too!

Tracey R. Bryant is a sensual woman, lover, Mother and G-Mama known as “The Honey Diva”. She is a Self Love and Sensual Empowerment Coach, of Honey Luv Lingerie & More “The Romance Store. and Feminine Health and Womb Wellness Practitioner of Sensual Honey Feminine Wellness . She loves all things feminine and sensual and she believes that feminine wellness, and creativity resides in the healing and balance of the Divine Feminine, “the Womb.” She is the hostess of HoneySoul Radio  a Love, Sex and Soul online radio show. She can be contacted at thehoneydiva1@gmail.com

Kama Sutra: Sexual Aids & Dildos… WHAT?

Kama Sutra

Lovers in ancient times had a responsibility one to another for sexual satisfaction, and lovemaking. In one of the world’s oldest sexual manuals the Kama Sutra, (“Kama” meaning love and desire, and “Sutra” meaning threading) it is said that lovemaking is a sacred duty between a man and a woman. It was taught within the natures of love, and a deep part of the culture, and as a way of life. Unlike what we are taught in today’s society. We are conditioned to feel shame, guilt and insecurity because of our natural sexual progression and sexual desire.

SensualFoodieChaiTeaSpices-1024x622During the 3rd century there was no such thing as an under orgasmic woman. A husband who was unable to satisfy his lover or his wife was to make every effort to remedy the situation. For a man’s inability to satisfy his wife was not part of the culture, and he must make every provision necessary that would either obtain his erection or encourage his wife’s sexual pleasure. Sages, and/or medicine men and women would prepare elixirs and aphrodisiacs with foods, herbs, and spice mixtures. Some consisted of goats milk, fennel, licorice, pumpkin seeds, cinnamon, almonds, honey, and ghee to strengthen the unfortunate man’s man muscle, and stimulate his sexual desire. If these elixirs weren’t bringing about the desired sexual results in a timely manner he was to remedy the sexually unfortunate situation with foreplay, oral sex or an artificial penis. Yes, you heard it right, a DILDO! He was to skillfully use an artificial penis to give sexual pleasure to his wife. This verse gives instruction to an artificial penis to be used to bring women to orgasmic delight and sexual satisfaction.

Gold Vibrator 2“The man who is utterly unable to achieve an erection should pleasure his wife/lover with a phallus crafted from materials like gold, silver, copper, iron, ivory or horn. The artificial phallus should be shaped to your natural proportions. It will be more arousing for the lady if the outside is studded with a profusion of large, smooth nodules” ( Kama Sutra: Part 7, Chapter 1, Sutras 4–8).

Ooooh, it sounds like these studs and nodules was meant for more vaginal stimulation and arousal upon entry and during penetration. Oh my! Who knew? Here we thought we were sexually advanced in the art of sexual novelties and stimulation, and ancient lovers created methods , means and artifacts to keep a woman happy and sexually satisfied in ancient times!

Black IntimacyFor those you who are sexually frustrated because of your belief that using sexual aids is prohibited. Give yourself permission to experience sexual aids, sexual pleasure, and it’s wonderful release with sexual innovation, and intervention. Don’t cheat yourself, treat yourself with a wonderful dong, dildo, and/or vibrator that can make your love life increase in sexual happiness, and orgasmic pleasure. Men love your woman enough to move pass your ego and let her become sexually satisfied until your beautiful man muscle is putting in work at optimal performance. Remember, a happy wife means a happy life!

When creating that intimate rendezvous with your lover Honey Luv has all of your boudoir sexcessories.  Visit our website at  Honey Luv Lingerie & More “The Romance Store” or contact us at 337.944.9131 Like us on Facebook  and follow us on Twitter @TheHoneyDiva. For your sensual soul listen to our radio show on Tuesday evenings at 9 pm CST on HoneySoul Radio on Blog Talk Radio.  Remember to “Live in the sensual and LOVE in the Delicious.”

The Honey Diva