Tag Archives: orgasm

Kama Sutra: Sexual Aids & Dildos… WHAT?

Kama Sutra

Lovers in ancient times had a responsibility one to another for sexual satisfaction, and lovemaking. In one of the world’s oldest sexual manuals the Kama Sutra, (“Kama” meaning love and desire, and “Sutra” meaning threading) it is said that lovemaking is a sacred duty between a man and a woman. It was taught within the natures of love, and a deep part of the culture, and as a way of life. Unlike what we are taught in today’s society. We are conditioned to feel shame, guilt and insecurity because of our natural sexual progression and sexual desire.

SensualFoodieChaiTeaSpices-1024x622During the 3rd century there was no such thing as an under orgasmic woman. A husband who was unable to satisfy his lover or his wife was to make every effort to remedy the situation. For a man’s inability to satisfy his wife was not part of the culture, and he must make every provision necessary that would either obtain his erection or encourage his wife’s sexual pleasure. Sages, and/or medicine men and women would prepare elixirs and aphrodisiacs with foods, herbs, and spice mixtures. Some consisted of goats milk, fennel, licorice, pumpkin seeds, cinnamon, almonds, honey, and ghee to strengthen the unfortunate man’s man muscle, and stimulate his sexual desire. If these elixirs weren’t bringing about the desired sexual results in a timely manner he was to remedy the sexually unfortunate situation with foreplay, oral sex or an artificial penis. Yes, you heard it right, a DILDO! He was to skillfully use an artificial penis to give sexual pleasure to his wife. This verse gives instruction to an artificial penis to be used to bring women to orgasmic delight and sexual satisfaction.

Gold Vibrator 2“The man who is utterly unable to achieve an erection should pleasure his wife/lover with a phallus crafted from materials like gold, silver, copper, iron, ivory or horn. The artificial phallus should be shaped to your natural proportions. It will be more arousing for the lady if the outside is studded with a profusion of large, smooth nodules” ( Kama Sutra: Part 7, Chapter 1, Sutras 4–8).

Ooooh, it sounds like these studs and nodules was meant for more vaginal stimulation and arousal upon entry and during penetration. Oh my! Who knew? Here we thought we were sexually advanced in the art of sexual novelties and stimulation, and ancient lovers created methods , means and artifacts to keep a woman happy and sexually satisfied in ancient times!

Black IntimacyFor those you who are sexually frustrated because of your belief that using sexual aids is prohibited. Give yourself permission to experience sexual aids, sexual pleasure, and it’s wonderful release with sexual innovation, and intervention. Don’t cheat yourself, treat yourself with a wonderful dong, dildo, and/or vibrator that can make your love life increase in sexual happiness, and orgasmic pleasure. Men love your woman enough to move pass your ego and let her become sexually satisfied until your beautiful man muscle is putting in work at optimal performance. Remember, a happy wife means a happy life!

When creating that intimate rendezvous with your lover Honey Luv has all of your boudoir sexcessories.  Visit our website at  Honey Luv Lingerie & More “The Romance Store” or contact us at 337.944.9131 Like us on Facebook  and follow us on Twitter @TheHoneyDiva. For your sensual soul listen to our radio show on Tuesday evenings at 9 pm CST on HoneySoul Radio on Blog Talk Radio.  Remember to “Live in the sensual and LOVE in the Delicious.”

The Honey Diva

Women’s History Month: Where’s Your Orgasm Black Women?

Black beauty 3

With the celebration of Women’s History this month we can’t forget the impact it had on the “Sexual Revolution.” It was a movement that gave voice to women’s sexual pleasure. She was no longer just a mere tool for men, and their need for sexual release and pleasure. She became sexually liberated! She took off those binding undergarments, and began a social movement that challenged traditional codes of behavior related to sexuality and interpersonal relationships throughout the Western world from the 1960s to the 1980s. Sexual liberation included increased acceptance of sex outside of traditional heterosexual, monogamous relationships, and premarital sex. It gave emphasis on women’s self pleasure, body acceptance, contraception, erotic fantasy, and orgasm. YES, I said it ORGASM! It also gave birth to feminism.

Many black women joined the Feminist Movement in search of equality. However, white women and black women’s fight for freedom and equality were very different in respects that white woman were looking to become liberated from her subjugation under her husband, from being white men’s property. It was true we had the same oppressor but, we had very different agendas. Black women desired liberation for herself, her husband, father, sons, daughters, mothers, and community. It wasn’t just about us, black women! We had children, and families. We had pretty black babies who were also developing under social, racial, and economic oppression. We had husbands who were just as much oppressed if not more, under this same order of oppression. Our issue was more about racial equality, educational access, and economic opportunity. We had a WHOOOOOLE lot more fish to fry!

It was about so much more than sexual independence, and pulling off our bras in the street. Many black women left the Feminist Movement and created their own independent Black Feminist movement, and theory that dealt with the issues of black women, race, family, cultural, economic and social conditions. Black Feminist needed to be a firm and viable voice for and within the Black Power movement. This created another challenge for black women. Many were not taken seriously in the Black Power movement due to the conditions in which male domination over women was well saturated in the fabric of American society, and within Black Culture. Black women were left finding her place and her voice, and this was a big addition to our strain within our Black Love relationships.

However, the order of male rule over women in general took shape many moons before slavery. It began in the 4th century  when Roman Emperor Constantine destroyed the Goddess Temples, and the worship of Black Goddesses, and replaced them with White Male Gods and the religion of Christianity. This was the era of doing away with the Feminine Principle, Goddess honor, and worship and the Matriarchal order.  It was replaced with the implementation of the European colonial rule, patriarchal order, government, white male privilege and ideology, and it was circulated throughout the globe.

Black women and white women may have the same oppressor but clearly we had two different fights. In the words of Mama Zogbe, “Before there was a war on Women's Powerrace there was a war on sex, their was a war against the feminine principle, and the Black Goddess.”

Not only were black women fighting for the rights of the family and community we were fighting for the right to be taking seriously within Western culture and society.

Many black women feel we shouldn’t be looked at or viewed as erotic or as sexual symbols in society. But, how else do you expect the Mother of Civilization to be viewed? Sexual energy is the generated driving force and life force of all existence. Because we are the first mothers of civilization, Black women are the driving force of this sexual nature. Yes, it’s a sad thing that this natural admiration has been denigrated to a form of mere lust, and tainted sexual psychology, however it can’t be denied. 

During my experiences as a sex worker. Many white men I have encountered subconsciously knew black women are the First Mothers. These men desired to be sexually dominated, often times through humiliation and painful measures of fulfillment, bowing into submission as they confessed their sins, negative and abusive behavior toward black women while honoring, praising and calling us Goddess, Queen, and Mother of the Universe. At the time I looked at this as some freaky fetish that I was providing for my clients. But, years later as I began to study women’s history, I now view it as an attempt for white men to redeem themselves of their past and current transgressions, and generational iniquity. Yeah, I know a trip, right? My life and stories as a former sex worker are many, and adventurous. It was amazing and I had a blast! *wink*

Now, this brings me to ask, “Where is your orgasm Black women? Yes, we know It wasn’t our agenda to fight for sexual liberation over our racial freedom and equality. But, now many of us have continued to do the same things that many of our fighting foremothers did, put ourselves on the back burning for our children, husbands, and families while everything, and everyone we profess that we love grows, and progresses around us. As the saying goes, “If Momma ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy!” I’m a firm believer of that!

Again, I ask you, “Where is YOUR orgasm Black women?” Where is your desire to be ALIVE, smell the roses, enjoy the wine, and eat the cookie DAMN IT!  Where is your desire to LIVE in your PURPOSE, and dream BIG? Have you denied your life and sacrificed, loving sexual experiences, and our amazing pleasure potential, for careers, advancement, and opportunity, while never enjoy the fruits of our labor? If you are having amazing, body shaking, Earth quaking orgasms good for you, continue BE alive, and elevate in joy, happiness, and the will to think and feel at one with everything in nature. Remain fertile and ABUNDANT.

black-man-kissing-black-womanBlack LOVE exists and it’s FREEDOM is based on our political, social, sexual and economic influence… “When you want to destroy a community and a people. One must destroy their romantic love. ” – Dr. Amos Wilson, “Purpose of Love in Black Female & Male Relationships.” 

Let’s not allow our desire for conscious activism within our families and communities keep us from springing forth in our feminine power, sexual freedom and pleasure. Let’s not sacrifice the intimacy and binding power of sexual pleasure in our relationships to create another kind of oppression that affects our relationships with ourselves, and our lovers. Everything needs balance, and order.

Celebrate Women’s History and re-introduce yourself to pleasure, whether it be self-pleasure or the pleasure of your lover. We are forging out of the mold of being simply the pleasure and domestic property of men. Experience sexual pleasure and liberate your soul. Let FREEDOM ring with some oooh’s and ahhh’s of healthy relationships and orgasm!

Want to know more about Women and Religion? Check out one of my favorite books that started me on the path of the Goddess, “When God Was a Women” by Merlin Stone. Also, need more information concerning the black women as Goddess and Matriarchal order before patriarchal manipulation? Check out Mama Zogbe’s book The Sybils: The Theft of African Prophecy by The Catholic Church.

For more on Black Feminist thoughts and theory check out www.blackfeminists.org and Patricia Hill Collin’s book, “Black Feminist Thought: Knowledge, Consciousness, and the Politics of Empowerment.”

Tracey R. Bryant also known as “The Honey Diva” is a Romance Specialist, a Self Love and Sensual Empowerment Coach, Holistic Sexual Health, Yoni Steam and Kemetic Reiki Practitioner, Womb Wellness, and Sex Educator. She is the owner of Sensual Honey Feminine Wellness – a new feminine and tranquil spa experience. She is also the owner of Honey Luv Lingerie & More “The Romance Store.” A sensual empowerment boutique that promotes romance, sensual and sexual health and wellness to women and couples. She is the hostess of HoneySoul Radio a Love, Sex and Relationship online radio show. She can be contacted at TheHoneyDiva1@gmail.com

 

 

 

 

The Benefits of Sexercise

 

Photo credit: AfroerotiK

Do you think of exercise as a chore? Well, try and have more sex and incorporate that sexy feel good activity and take advantage of burning calories with a “Pleasure Workout.” Count calories burned per hour and relieve unwanted stress with each enjoyable moment. Bending, stretching, crouching and squatting have never felt this good! Sexercise produces “feel good” hormones and reduces stress and  is a natural stimulator. Realize that even 30 minutes of sexercise every day will naturally release “feel good” hormones, those endorphines that are vital to feeling confident, calm, happy and sexy. 

Check out the benefits:

Licking….28 
Tickling…17

Moaning….5 per moan 

Kissing….25
Screaming….24 
Shouting….20
Begging….22
Orgasm…57
Orgasm w/Vibrator…75 

Orgasm and Speaking in tongues…. a whopping 160 calories burned. 
Sex Positions:
Man on Top….20 
Woman on Top….25
Doggy Style….40
Standing….90
Oral….40

Good, Hot Streaming Sex…up to 350 calories per hour. 

Who said Making Love isn’t good for your health? Sex does a body GOOD! Whatever your mood or sensual persuasion when creating that intimate rendezvous with that sexy someone Honey Luv has all of your boudoir sexcessories. Visit our website at Honey Luv Lingerie & More “The Romance Store” Like us on Facebook  and follow us on Twitter @TheHoneyDiva. For your sensual soul listen to HoneySoul Radio every Tuesday evening on Blog Talk Radio. Live in the sensual and love in the delicious.

FOREPLAY: Get More Play!

Foreplay is not just physical. Good foreplay is letting go of inhibitions that can keep you from enjoying yourself and your lover. Feeling good about yourself and your feelings will give you the confidence you need to arrive at sensual and sexual pleasure. Creating your space and environment ahead of time with sexy lingerie, a bubble bath, soft music, candles, and aromatic or tasty love oils will give you more control when the time comes to be sensually aroused. When you want to enhance a sacred union with a sexy and romantic mood the sense of smell (aromatic stimulation), touch (cuddling & massage), taste (kissing & oral stimulation), sight (sexy lingerie), and sound (music) are all participants in you and your lover having a pleasurable erotic experience.
Men may not need foreplay to have sex. Hell, many guys are good to go after just a gust of wind. But a new study proves that guys ache for a little pre-sex action. However, most women have never learned this key lust lesson.  Research shows that men are as interested in foreplay as women are and that they want more than they’re having.  The reason is simple. Men appreciate foreplay for the same reasons women do — it feels good physically, so the common consensus that men like it fast and furious is only a myth. But now that you’re clued into this covert carnal craving, you can give him the bedroom buildup he’s jonesin’ for. Here are some  foreplay for him tips.

 Kiss Him Hard

Men like intense, down and dirty, rough and raw kissing. Men are turned on by women who are confident and passionate while kissing. Make it an all over body experience.

Put your whole body into the act of making out, says Ava Cadell, Ph.D., author of Stock Market Orgasm. “The more body parts involved, the more intense the experience.” Her formula for an earthshaking smacker he’ll never forget: Cradle his face with one hand and grab his butt with the other while you simultaneously press your breasts and pelvis against him.

Tantalize All of His Senses

Too often, touch is the only sense that takes center stage during pre-intercourse play. But to graduate from basic to mind-blowing foreplay, you have to incorporate all of his passion receptors. Every type of sensory stimulation — the sight of a woman’s body, her whispers and the smell of her skin activates parts of the brain responsible for sexual arousal. Create a combination that treats several senses at the same time. This is the key to a beyond-divine buildup, especially for men. Other ways to make foreplay a full-body experience: Leave the lights on and listen to an extra-sexy CD, or dim the lights and give him a sexy lapdance, take a shower together by the light of scented candles, or drizzle each other with champagne and lick it off as it fizzes on your skin. These are sure fire ways to keep each of your super aroused.

Take Charge

In bed, guys are often so focused on pleasing their partners that they don’t get to bask in being a sex object. By taking the reins, “not only does it show him that you’re into the action as much as he is, but it also feels great to him to have somebody concentrating on his pleasure,” says Dr. Ava Cadell. You know the feeling, right? So, call some shots in the sack Ms. Thang. For instance, if he makes a move to head down below, pull him back up and instead give him the oral affection he deserves.

Bring Him to the Brink

Once you’ve gotten him to a combustible point, he’ll be begging to get to the main event. Ignore him. It’s a guaranteed way to drive him wild with horny, and amplify his orgasm later. The more someone anticipates sex, the more aroused they get, and therefore, the intensity of their sexual experience increases. For example, “almost oral sex” Head down south, get real close and then pass by with just a hot breath. By the time you finally put your mouth on him, it feels so good that he will almost cry with relief. We promise he’ll be begging for mercy.

Let’s not forget the after play ladies. It is just as important. Stroke his hair gently while in his arms. Whisper words of love softly in his ear. Kiss his neck gently. Stroke him tenderly while he lies in your arms and leave a love note in the bathroom. Let him know that you enjoyed him fully. Pleasing your mate can be so rewarding and satisfying. It sends healthy messages of love and intimacy that truly count.

For all of your boudoir sexcessories visit our website at Honey Luv Lingerie & More “The Romance Store” Like us on Facebook  and follow us on Twitter @TheHoneyDiva. For your sensual soul listen to HoneySoul Radio every Tuesday evening on Blog Talk Radio. Live in the sensual and love in the delicious.

SACRAL CHAKRA: Your Orgasmic Creative Energy

Sexual Energy

Sexual Energy is creative energy. It is the life force of all things manifest in the universe. Your imagination is made up of creative energy.  The Sex Sacral Chakra and her energy bring  love, sensuality, enthusiasm, creativity, curiosity, intuition, self worth, and personality to our beings.  As children we are very in touch with this energy and our Sacral Chakra, and are in fact sensual beings. We are extremely creative, imaginative, and loving. As children we love to touch everything, play, befriend others and to hug those we love. We were free in our self expression and loved giving and receiving love from others.  In Western society not long after the age of 6 comes socialization, and that loving, playful, free spirit is no longer nurtured or accepted among our culture. It is a part of our childhood development. We are taught that sex is nasty and sexual guilt and shame blocks our ability to experience friendly enthusiasm, conscious creativity, sexual freedom and fullness of  their enjoyments.

Where Is The Vortex of This Creative Energy Located?

Well, the Sex Sacral Chakra is located two inches below the navel and is rooted into the spine. It’s known as the second chakra is often referred to as the belly or sacral chakra. It governs our emotions, our sense of self-worth, our confidence with ourselves and with our individual creativity, and it also governs our ability to relate to others in an open and friendly manner. Proper balance of this chakra means the ability to flow with your emotions freely.  If this chakra energy is blocked you may feel an emotional overload, very manipulative, obsessed with thoughts of sex, sexual dysfunction and/or a lack physical energy. 

It’s Represented By The Color Orange 

This chakra  is vibrant and highly charged. It stimulates feelings of renewal. It’s energy is represented by the color orange. Orange is a fun color and can make you feel quite playful. Add some orange accessories to your ensemble and add a flair of joy and playfulness. Also, adding a touch of orange to your color scheme in your sacred bed chamber (bedroom) can actually open up feelings of mindfulness and help to create positive sexual energy while getting your love making on.

Sacred Orgasm

The energy of a full body orgasm also known as a sacred orgasm comes from the bodies center of the sex sacral chakra. This energy rises up and starts with a tingling sensation within the hands and the feet. It comes up through all seven chakras as a pulling sensation up through the stomach, the chest and up to the mind through the third eye and crown chakra. This sacred sexual energy then releases itself.  This is known as a mindless state which means you are not thinking from anywhere between 2 to 5 seconds. A sacred orgasm comes in waves of tingling sensations and can last up to ten minutes. This gives me all the more reason to want to stay in-tuned to this energy. It’s elevated ecstasy at it’s highest frequency. 

Foods Are Aphrodisiacs and Increase Sexual Energy

  • Sweet Fruits: Melons, mangos, strawberries, passion fruit, oranges, bananas & coconut ~These are a few fruits containing natural sugar and give a natural source of high energy.
  • Honey: It was known as the food/nectar of the God’s & Goddesses in Egypt & Greece.
  • Nuts: Almonds, walnuts, cashews, pecans, sesame seeds ~Nuts were known as symbols of fertility in Rome. They have loads of B vitamins that boost sex hormones and libido.
  • Spices: Cinnamon, vanilla, carob, sweet paprika, ginger, clove & cayenne pepper ~Are just some of the spices that have full bodied rich flavors and spicy properties that heighten the senses of pleasure.

 

If you want to improve your overall sexual health and wellness get in tuned to your creative energy source. Our sex sacral chakra creates  full bodied orgasms to help us improve overall emotional, and mental health. It stimulates and enhances our creativity. It is known to help relieve depression, headaches, menstrual cramps, urinary problems, which have been known to decrease. This is such an added bonus.  Enjoy intimacy and pleasure while creating a positive flow of life energy and awaken and expand your creative force. Share orgasms and elevate your intuition and confidence all in the name of LOVE. It doesn’t get much better than that.

Learn more about Sacred Sexuality at “The Source School of Tantra” with our friends Charles Muir & Leah Alchen. They have a great article on their website   “Tantra: The Art Of Conscious Loving” by Mark Gramunt of the Yoga Journal.

Lisa Schrader has an excellent website Awakening Shakti She gives excellent insight on how to become one with your inner Goddess.  Her article on “Tantra: A Path of Love, Energy & Spirit”  is an great read for understanding the power of this sexual creative energy.

For all of your boudoir sexcessories visit our website at Honey Luv Lingerie & More “The Romance Store”  Like us on Facebook  and follow us on Twitter @TheHoneyDiva. For your sensual soul listen to HoneySoul Radio every Tuesday evening on Blog Talk Radio. Live in the sensual and love in the delicious.